This was an eventful week and one that was a complete disaster for the Democratic Party. Impeachment finally ended, unsurprisingly, with an acquittal which was slightly overshadowed by the Dem elites showing their incompetence when they couldn’t figure out what happened in Iowa. Bernie Sanders won Iowa’s popular vote and it looks like he’ll be tied with Pete for delegates but the data looks riddled with errors so who knows. Sometimes I honestly think the leaders of the Democratic Party are trying to lose that way there’s no pressure on them to actually do something.
Impeachment Finale
After being impeached in the House, President Trump was acquitted by the Senate after no witnesses were called and with Mitt Romney being the only Republican voting to convict. Like usual in Washington, neither side looks good in what happened, but the Democrats certainly look worse. There were no witnesses called as some Senate Republicans admitted the President did what he was accused of but that it was a simply a “policy difference” and not worthy of impeachment. As always it was very funny watching the goalposts move from Republicans from “he didn’t do it” to “But, but, but, Joe Biden” to “it wasn’t that bad” and then it just moves to the next outrage. The one thing you kinda have to respect the GOP for is that no matter how many times they change their story or contradict themselves they stand firm and it works as they don’t get called out by the media for any of it. Other Senators (Susan Collins) are saying they didn’t vote to convict because Trump learned his lesson from this whole thing (no joke needed for that claim). However, even with all the goalpost moving and spinzones coming from the right, the Democrats look manage to look worse. As I’ve been saying from the beginning it was incredibly stupid to focus something as big as impeachment on Ukrainian aid. No real, actual person gives a shit about that. The Democrats STILL DON’T HAVE HIS TAXES. They’ve controlled the House for over a year and can’t do something as simple as that. If they really wanted to take him down they should’ve gotten those and said hey look how much money he’s making off being President. Maybe investigate assassinating a couple of foreign officials? Look at paying off a pornstar? Planning a Trump Tower Moscow? The scam that was Trump U? Obstruction of Justice? Nope….the geniuses in the House leadership chose fucking Ukraine aid to hang this whole charade on and because of that, they got the result they deserved.
Debacle in Iowa
Speaking of Democratic incompetence, the candidates running to face off President Trump had the first contest in Iowa this week. Now of course the party that’sbeen sooooo concerned with election interference used the unhackable tech of paper to count the votes right??? Of course not….instead they decided to use a fucking app designed by some Hilary for America grifters. The company that designed this app was legitimately named SHADOW….because nothing says transparency like allowing a company named Shadow to handle the results. They then decided to double down on their stupidity by releasing only 62% of the vote while they tallied the rest. Now ignoring how stupid that is, if you’re gonna do that you do it must be because you’re positive those votes are 10000% correct. Obviously, they were riddled with errors and the media reported them because they apparently have nothing better to talk about than incorrect data. The whole thing is such a shitshow it’s hard to believe these people in charge ever got power over anything let alone an entire fucking political party. If you fuck up and don’t have the results that same night, then wait until you have every single vote counted and have tripled checked their accuracy before releasing it. Heads have to roll after this whole thing. The leader of the Iowa Democratic Party has to go and so does Tom Perez (DNC chair). Lucky for Tom though it would make the Dems look worse if they fired him after only 1 contest so he’ll get to stay in power a little longer. It’s ironic though that for over 4 years Democrats have been clinically paranoid about Russia, seeing Putin behind every dark corner, but when it came down to it the biggest threat to elections was their own incompetence.
Trump Admin Blowing Up National Monument For “The Wall”
The Intercept ran a good story, about how the Trump administration is setting off dynamite in a national monument, UNESCO biosphere, and land sacred to local Native Americans in order to build more of his wall in southern Arizona. This is the type of story that the national media and Democrats should focus on more. Even when Republicans controlled Congress for 2 years they couldn’t pass funding for the wall. But no one seems inclined to try to stop this or any other building of the wall. Regardless of you’re stance on immigration, everyone should be in agreement that the wall is an incredibly dumb idea. You know you’re “solution” to a problem is bad when there are several easy ways to avoid it. Even ignoring tunnels (the most used way to get into the country) anyone looking to get in the U.S, faced with a wall can get past it with a couple shovels, a ladder, a fucking trampoline, or even a Bluth Company stair-car.
Trump Admin Bringing Back Landmines
Yes you read that correctly, the Trump admin is bringing back LANDMINES. Honestly between a wall and landmines what fucking year does Trump think it is??? However, there are some odds of what outdated thing Trump will bring back next and knowing him one of these will be brought back before his term is up.
Nancy Pelosi Rips Up Trump’s Speech
Now I didn’t watch the State of the Union speech but it must’ve been pretty inconsequential if the big story coming out of it was Nancy Pelosi ripping up Trump’s speech afterwards. My only take on this is…..I don’t give a single shit and neither should you. There’s an infinite amount of more important things going on in the world. Plus it’s not even close to the worse thing Pelosi did this week…
Juan Guaido Goes to Washington
The Venezuelan opposition member was a guest of the President for the State of the Union and Nancy Pelosi proceeded to welcome him as a guest to Congress. She praised him for his “courage” and as a “friend to democracy”. Now for those who have not followed the Venezuela saga, the U.S, among other imperialists, have called for the removal of President Maduro citing irregularities in his election. Guaido tried to claim himself President but when that foolproof plan somehow didn’t work he stuck around still trying to gain legitimacy. All the puppets of the Military Industrial Complex are backing him and it seems like a sensible plan as whens the last time a CIA backed leader ever failed or did anything bad??? Now in spirit with Guaido, after the embarrassment in Iowa, I am declaring myself the leader of Iowa and I’m sure that once the CIA gets back to me on my endorsement request I too will be celebrated and welcomed to Washington with open arms as a legitimate leader.
Clown Take of the Week
As always there were a lot of contenders for this award. Everyone who suddenly doesn’t care about Iowa after Bernie won was in contention but there were too many to single out just one. Instead the winner of the Clown Take of the Week is former Senator and current MSNBC talking head Claire McCaskill. Talking about Mitt Romney’s Impeachment Vote, she said “He’s going to sleep soundly. His children are going to look at him with pride. And at the end of the day, isn’t that way more important?”. This quote is the perfect showcase for the how shallow the liberal ideology is. All you need to do for these neoliberals or establishment figures is just 1 thing and you’re past is forgotten and you’re a hero. Previously it was John McCain for his vote against repealing ObamaCare. Then every #Resister built a shrine to lifelong Republican Robert Mueller and treated him as their deity. Now people are doing the same with Mitt Romney. Forget Bain Capital and everything else they went after him for in 2012 and forget him tucking his tail between his legs and interviewing for a job with Trump after 2016. Now that he made this vote that literally accomplishes nothing he is the epitome of courage and morality.
MSNBC: Take our money…We need your expertise
Clown of the Week
Nancy Pelosi did everything she could to win this, as did another moron MSNBC talking head Jason Johnson (quick thread on his incompetence this week). But the only person that could be the Clown of the Week is DNC chair Tom Perez. Either Perez was in the dark about the app that would be used in Iowa or he thought it was a good idea….either way he looks like an idiot. Then he came out of the blue right before the final results came in and called for a recount. Now this is not something the DNC can actually do as it must be called for by a campaign. Perez (and the DNC by extension) just looks so bad through all of this as if he was actually concerned about the legitimacy of the results he would’ve called for none of the results to be released until they were confirmed accurate. Coincidentally Perez made this call right as Bernie was catching up to Pete in State Delegates (and extending his popular vote lead). Honestly the fastest way for Perez to get me to respect him would be to say he was trolling. Clearly he wasn’t though and even if you ignore all the shadiness that occurred in Iowa (the app was developed by people with clear links to the Democratic establishment, Pete paying the company that developed it, releasing partial data with Pete leading, & Perez’s timing) it is still a complete disaster. While I do think there was some nefariousness going on, I think the main problems here were greed and stupidity. This is one of the biggest reasons people like Perez and the DNC despise outsiders like Bernie….cause they know if someone like him was in charge all the cash going to idiot strategists and consultants will dry up. It’s seems impossible now that after the election Perez will be in charge of the DNC but honestly if he makes it that far he should be thankful.
District of Clowns 